The Mother

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“I am so angry with God. If there is a God and I meet God in the other world, I will tell him he owes me big time.” The mother said with intensity.

“What do you mean?” The daughter asked her mother.

“I am going to ask God, why he brought me to this world? Why so much misery, suffering – struggle? What have I done to deserve this? “

“I remember one time you shared with me about meeting God in your dream.”

She was joyful and excited “Yes, I did. I heard a voice in my dream saying that this is God you wanted to see. It was a beautiful light and felt warm.”

“You are really blessed to have such a powerful and affirming vision. Yes, my image of God is also a beautiful light of warm energy. I wonder if you asked your question.”

“No I didn’t.” it happened so fast.

“I heard you say many times you have a strong sixth sense. What do think of your life’s purpose?”

“I don’t know. A whole lifetime of struggle. What is the point? I didn’t get to do anything I wanted to do.”

“Would you like to do a review of your life together as if we were watching a video of your life based on what you remember?”

“What is the point? The past is the past. I can’t change it. Now, after living almost 90 years, I feel my life was wasted. Nothing makes me happy. Most of my family and friends have passed away. Those remaining are old, sick and worse off than me. No social life, no one comes to visit. I can’t really go anywhere, air pollution, can’t breathe, heavy traffic; I don’t want to go anywhere.”

The mother was repeating her old tape which the daughter had heard a million times. A tape of complains, focusing on negative and lacks.

The daughter loving her mother was longing to understand her psyche, be able to reach her soul beyond her long story of a lifetime of trauma.

“What do you know or remember about your childhood?” The daughter asked.

“I was only 40 days old when my father passed away in the cold snowy winter.”

“Do you know anything about how he passed?”

“He was a fine man in his early 40’s, father of five children. I don’t know why he died.”

“I heard something about drinking and smoking opium. Do you think perhaps addiction had anything to do with it?”

“Where did you hear that?” She sounded defensive.

“I heard from my oldest aunt who was with her father when he passed away. I think she was 12 years old then.”

“She frequently made up stories to get attention. You can’t trust what she said.”

The daughter was wondering about the dynamics in the family. Her mother as the youngest child suffered the most. Perhaps, unconsciously she was determined to guard her family . Maybe she thought it was her duty, being loyal. The daughter wondered if the mother be willing to pass through her denial if she knew it would bring her a sense of love, safety and freedom.

“My father knew when was going to die. He told my oldest sister the day he died that he would leave at 4 pm and sure enough he died at 4 pm!”

“Yes, I heard that from my aunt too. It seemed that he had strong intuition. Perhaps he gave you the gift of intuition too. Do you know what kind of a person he was?”

“No, I don’t know much, my mother told me he was her second cousin coming from a well off family.  He was a kind and generous. In cold season, he would give his coat to the beggars on the street.

Mother seemed to be back in time wondering about her childhood and the father she didn’t know.

“I have always wondered how your young mother in her early 30’s raised five children as a single parent. Do you have any ideas?”

“I loved my mother. She was a strong woman. She raised us with the monthly salary of her husband from the government.”

“It would be difficult for me to imagine her raising five children with a newborn, alone. Did she have any help?”

“She didn’t have any milk for me. I had a nanny who had a baby and fed me too. My nanny was a Kurdish woman. You know Kurds (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iranian_Kurdistan) are strong, determined and willful. My family always told me I was like Kurds, stubborn!”

“Yes, I can imagine your mother facing so much stress that her milk dried up. Perhaps she had so much on her mind. I heard your oldest brother was an active boy, maybe a rebel difficult to manage and needed a father at age 11.”

“Our relatives wanted to send the two boys ,my brothers to a private boarding school in Beirut. My mother declined.”

“How about finances?”

“My mother was from a wealthy family. I’ve heard that one of the Qajar kings asked her to be one of his wives!”

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Qajar_dynasty

The mother always acted like a royalty. She seemed to be a princess misplaced in this family by mistake. She loved beauty, elegance & luxury, dressed sharply with matching accessories. She always looked presentable outside the home. She was an aristocrat at heart.

The mother continued, “My family had many properties and we received monthly salary form the income.”

“Who was in charge of the property after your father passed away?”

“I think an uncle. I heard he took most of the income for himself and his family, including our family’s share.”

The daughter did not wish to trigger any unnecessary painful memories. She was hoping to bring healing to the mother’s trembling, anxious heart by awareness and insight. She would then have a choice to release the painful impact of the traumatic childhood and enjoy her life with a sense of joy and freedom. She became aware of inconsistencies in mom’s story, wondered how reliable her stories are. Were they facing a secret? She wondered. How did the mother provide for five children? Who defended her legal rights if they had property income?

“My mother sent the two boys to military school. Many families did that at the time, you know for boys to learn discipline.”

The daughter was wondering if the mother was unable to parent the active boys. Was the decision financially based? Wondered under what circumstances a parent sends young boys in all-male military boarding school where boys must be obedient at all times.

“Yes, I heard from my uncle he escaped from the school and went home. He became the “man” of the household at young age. How did he treat you?”

“He used to send me to bring water from the house water reservoir at night. I was a young child. It was dark with many steps down. I was frightened. Then he would make scary noises that a monster was coming to get me. I am still afraid of the dark after all these years.”

The mother paused, seemed sad and fearful as she was back in time.

“He was intentionally trying to scare you. What do you make of that?”

“They thought it was funny, laughing.”

“ I wonder if he was doing to you what was done to him. He must have been afraid.”

“Oh no, he was brave. Fearless. He had shotguns. He was a hunter. I was afraid of him.”

“ I wonder if he acted as a fearless person at home, a mask, a persona to cover up his fear. I do remember him hunting deer. I didn’t like seeing the lifeless bodies in the back of his truck. What is brave about hunting defenseless animals?”

For the compliant  obedient, fear based child, it is difficult to see the fear behind the mask of the oppressor. A fearless person has no need to frighten others, let alone a young child. A fearful person consciously or unconsciously would be willing to go a long way to cover his own fear, frequently through violence to intimidate others.

“Any  significant memories from your childhood?”

“I remember crawling on the balcony. I heard them telling not to go yet I continued crawling.  I fell and hit my head on the cold stone.” See, this is the scar on my forehead.

“You remember when you were crawling? Yes,  I have noticed the scar before; it is a big.”

The daughter was wondering about the possibilities of brain injury and long term effects. Could it be that some of her mother’s behaviors, confusing to her, be related to an early physical trauma?

“You also have mark near your lips. Do you know how you got that?”

“It is a “salak”, leishmaniosis, don’t remember. I was teased because of it, felt ugly. As a child, I used to look at my face and cover the two scars wondering how I would look without the scars.

The daughter was looking at her mother with much deeper compassion feeling the wounded child within her aging body, all the unhealed traumas of childhood still alive in her soul. A realization emerged. She didn’t like herself, projecting her inner pain to her children.

“So, this brother became like a father to you. I wonder how you felt about him, growing up.”

“I remember I was in 6th grade, had a test in sewing. I needed a couple of coins to buy a piece of fabric to do stitches in class to pass the test. My friend from school came to my home to go together. I asked my brother for a coin. I told him we were late for school. He started making fun of us, teasing us. I begged him. I was going to fail a whole year if I didn’t make it to class on time.  I will never forget that as long as I live.”

The daughter could imagine her mother in her school uniform begging, feeling anxious, helpless, powerless, hopeless, and fearful of expressing her repressed anger. A moment of clarity, grounds for her severe depression as long as the daughter remembered.

“Your brother finally gave you the money and you passed the test.”

“He was the one who decided for you to get married at a young age, right?”

“Yes, I was in 6th grade. I was in front of the mirror putting a ribbon in my hair. He saw me and decided it was time for me to get married. I loved school, loved to go to high school, get a degree and become somebody.

The daughter could feel the longing of the soul of this woman with high hopes and dreams never manifested.  An insight; the mother projected her dreams into her daughter. She wondered what was the impact on her, being a child bride and a mother at such tender young age.

“What was the role of your mother about her three daughters and getting married?”

“She gave my oldest sister away to a man she didn’t liked. She was so beautiful. If mother had waited a while she had many suitors. Her husband was a loving and kind man who helped our family a lot. He was like a father to me. I loved him.”

The daughter remembered her grandma who lived to be 90+ years old, very well. She had interesting beliefs, many of which, she didn’t understand. Some were religious based, some seemed to be superstitious. She believed in – the bad eye – and curses. The daughter wondered about the basis of the grandmother’s choice, need for financial support and fear of a curse, and following the traditions.

“My second sister was brave like our mother. She refused to marry the man our brother was forcing her to accept as a husband. She chose her husband later in life. My brother wanted to give me away before I came of age, not become like my sister.”

“How did you feel about getting married?”

“Your father was friend of my second brother. They met in military school and he was coming to our home frequently. I liked him because he was an engineer and helped me with my math homework and brought me all the smacks I liked.”

“He was a good looking man too, handsome in his army uniform.”

She had a smile on her face, “yes, he was handsome. When we were engaged, one time he tried to kiss me, I got frightened and ran away. I told him I was going to tell my mother what you tried to do!”

The daughter imagined the scene in her mind smiling at the innocence of the young girl liking a man for bringing her sour plums, her favorite. Was she aware of his intentions?

“You had a great wedding and your brother paid for it. That was thoughtful of him.”

“Your father was supposed to marry his first cousin . He liked our family, different from his. He didn’t have any savings for a wedding reception and his family was against his decision. So, my brother paid for our wedding.”

“I have seen your wedding photo taken at the photo shop, no smile…”

“It was not customary to smile.”

“You both looked so young and beautiful.”

“It was the first time I had make up on, wearing long dress.”

“How was the first few months of marriage for you?”

“I missed my mother. Whenever I said to your dad, I wanted to go home, he’d say “your home is here now.” I got pregnant and had our son nine months later.”

“How old were you?”

“About 15 years old.”

“I am aware, at the time, it was the tradition for girls to get married young. How was your life as a young mother?”

“The baby cried for nine months. I took him to many doctors yet no one could tell me what was wrong. I thought I didn’t know how to sooth him. Fathers, at the time didn’t help with raising children. It wasn’t customary. He was to go to work early in the morning. I had to hold the baby all night walking to keep him quiet with fear of waking him up. I was exhausted.”

“What was going on with the baby? Was your mother helping?”

“We learned he had a congenital heart problem with the valve when he was exempted from military service. None of the doctors recognized it. The baby cried so hard, he got a hernia.”

“It must have been physically, emotionally and spiritually exhausting for you. I can’t imagine the pain for a young mother. I wonder if it made you feel insecure as a wife and as a mother.”

“Yes it did. I felt so tired and frustrated not knowing what to do! To make matters worse, my second brother and his mature wife, older than him, had a son, nine months older than my son. When he went home, his wife would put the baby to sleep, put on a pretty dress and make up – perfume, make a tray of his favorite alcohol and snacks and welcome him home with music. Then a big delicious dinner and going to bed happy. Your father would see and expect the same thing from me while I was dying for an hour of sleep.”

“I wonder if your sister in law did that with intention! You shared with me she left her son when he was only nine months old and they divorced. There is discrepancy with that “show” and reality. I remember that cousin was severely wounded growing up without parental love.”

“Ya, while I was so overwhelmed with the baby alone at home, your father who loved playing cards, would go out frequently to have a good time with his friends. Your brother was about five years old and I was just beginning to breathe again. The only way to be with your father was to learn to play cards and join him and I did.

My mother helped taking care of our son. Then my mother thought it was time for a second child.”

“I wonder if your mother was tired of raising two grandsons. It seems as if the decision was made for you.”

“I was still tired and honestly after all that hardship didn’t want any more children.”

“I can feel the inner pain. I guess according to the cultural norms, the primary role for women is to be homemakers and raise children.”

“You were such a good child. I didn’t even know how you grew up? You didn’t give me any trouble at all.”

The daughter, a complaint child, was thinking to herself, her mother never knew of her inner pain. She thought her mother acted overwhelmed with her own life having no room to hear about any issues of her children. She wondered to herself asking “was that the truth or her distorted perception?.”

In her journey of her self-discovery it was essential for her to find out.

Was she making an assumption?

“Mom, I had a painful childhood.” She shared gently and kindly, no interest in triggering feelings of inadequacy in her mother.

“What? You had a painful childhood?” The mother seemed agitated, angry as if insulted.

“I raised you guys perfectly. Without any help at all. Your father never helped. As a man he didn’t even consider helping me with parenting. We didn’t have any of the comfort you guys had. I ironed all your cloths, even socks. I sew your dresses myself taking models from the European journals. You and your brother were the best dressed children among all our family and friends.”

The old tape had been triggered, storied shared a thousands of times were told again. The daughter gained the insight she was looking for; her mother was a survivor of severe childhood traumas. The unacknowledged, untreated painful traumas seemed to have left a lifetime scar on her psyche. Over the years, the pain had turned into deep frustration, anger, resentment and hatred. The volcano was erupting. Her depth of her defensiveness was louder than any spoken words.

The daughter thought to herself what is the point of this conversation?

How does an adult child respond to a volcano of the hot lava eruption frequently with every word, every thought being a trigger?

There was a moment of clarity. The daughter remembered “Clarity is power!” she was free from self-doubt. She had given her best to the mother. Years of listening to mother’s old stories of her painful childhood traumas had not brought any healing for anyone.

An insight emerged; once can’t help anyone who is not willing to receive. The change can only come from within with intention and readiness for change. How does a loving person let go of a loved one with compassion? She thought to herself. Let go. Let go.

She kneed down, opened her heart and soul and asked for guidance. How could she release her mother with love.

How would she deal with the guilt feeling inside and the ego’s loud voice, “She is your MOTHER. You chose her.”

She was reminded of the story of Saint Francis of Assisi in the quietness of the dark night. St. Francis left his abusive father at young age. He gave the father even his clothing, didn’t want anything from the father. He left to create his own path in life. Many years passed and he became an enlightened man through his life experiences.

One day, a messenger came in a hurry to let him know his father is in his death bed and wants to see him. He immediately got ready to go, paused and asked himself; do I really want to see my father? He experienced an intense internal struggle. He thought to himself, I really don’t wish to see him yet his my father and he is dying. What should I do?

He sat for mediation and asked his higher power for guidance. He sat in silence, cleansing all his thoughts, giving permission for the divine message.

The inner voice came clearly stating, you always have a choice not to be around those who take your energy away regardless of the relationship.

Saint Francis gave thanks and with clear conscious decided to stay home sending loving energy to his father.

The daughter was in peace after over six decades. She was thinking of her sister taking care of their mother.

Acceptance of self and others is a choice, a life altering choice.

Miracle Miles (M&M)

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I want to show you…

The wonders of the universe

The warmth of the sun on your skin

The breathing of fresh air

The beauty of a colorful butterfly

The song of a nightingale

The movement of a caterpillar

The amazing hummingbird hovering in mid-air

The soothing sound of ocean waves

The symphony of rain falling

The colorful autumn leaves

The brightness of silver moon

The warmth of a tender touch

The cuddly bear hug

The calming sound of a lullaby

The sweet taste of strawberries

The twinkle of distant stars

The changing shapes of the clouds

The joy of walking barefoot on the beach

The shapes of snowflakes

The exotic wild flowers

The playful squirrels chasing each other

The aroma of a white gardenia

The tender love of grandma

The joyful splashing of water in a puddle

The beauty of your face in my eyes

Miracle Miles, life is a struggle, yet an interesting and mysterious adventure.

YOU ARE A MIRACLE!

 

Translated in German

Das Wunder Miles

Ich möchte euch

Das Wunder des Universums zeigen.
Die Wärme der Sonne  auf der Haut  
Das Einatmen frischer Luft
Die Schönheit eines farbenfrohen Schmetterlings
Das Lied einer Nachtigall
Die Fortbewegung einer Raupe
Das erstaunliche Flügelschlagen eines Kolibris auf der Stelle
Der beruhigende Klang von Meereswellen
Die Sinfonie des fallenden Regens
Die bunten Herbstblätter
Das Strahlen des Silbermondes
Die Wärme einer zärtlichen Berührung
Eine knuddlige aufmunternde Umarmung
Der beruhigende Klang eines Wiegenliedes
Der süße Geschmack von Erdbeeren
Das Funkeln von fernen Sternen
Das Verändern der Gebilde von Wolken
Die Freude am Barfußlaufen am Strand
Die Gebilde der Schneeflocken
Die exotischen Wildblumen
Die verspielten Eichhörnchen, die sich gegenseitig  verfolgen
Der Duft einer weißen Gardenie
Die zärtliche Liebe der Großmutter
Das lustige  Spritzen des Wassers in einer Pfütze
Die Schönheit deines Gesichtes in meinen Augen
Du Wunder Miles, das Leben ist ein Kampf und dennoch ein interessantes und mysteriöses Abenteuer.
DU BIST EIN WUNDER
Translated by Ulrike Boker
—— In Spanish Translated By Christian Piker ——

El Milagro de Miles

Quiero mostraste las maravillas del universo

la calidez del sol sobre tu piel

la respiracion del aire fresco

la belleza de una colorida mariposa

la canción de un ruiseñor

el movimiento de una oruga

el asombroso picaflor revoloteando en el aire

el tranquilizador sonido de las olas del mar

la sinfonia de la caida de la lluvia

el colorido de las hojas otonales

el brillo de la luna de plata

la calidez de una caricia

el mimoso abrazo de oso

el tranquilizador sonido de una canción de cuna

el dulce sabor de las frutillas

el titilar de las estrellas distantes

el cambio de forma de las nubes

el goce de caminar descalzo sobre la playa

la forma de los cereales

las exoticas flores salvajes

las jugetonas ardillas persiguiendo una a otra

el aroma de una blanca gardenia

el tierno amor de una abuela

el placentero salpicar del agua en un charco

la belleza de tu rostro en mis ojos

milagro Miles, la vida es una lucha; pero también una interesante y misteriosa aventura.

Tu Eres Un Milagro

Basia

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“God, if you are there, give me a reason to live. Please help me.”

I am sitting with this beautiful, phenomenal woman, eager to hear the story of her spiritual transformation. How did this beautiful, colorful butterfly emerged from a dark cocoon? I wonder…

“What was going on in your life at the time? How long ago?”

“On August 15, 2005, I was at the end of my rope. I felt I had no reason to live. I was out of money, months behind in my bills, unemployed, living in California in 2001, away from friends and family in Chicago.

“It seems you were determined to take your life. What inspired you to reach out to God?”

“I had lost all faith in God since I was 12 years old. With what I experienced as a child, I stopped believing in God. I thought if there was God, He would have intervened and stopped the abuse.”

“Yes, I can relate, I felt the same way. For a young, innocent, dependent child, the pain is deep and you have no choice of leaving the family dysfunction. What kind of family did you have?”

“I was born in 1946 in Chicago to a blue collar family. My father was an alcoholic who took all his frustration on me with beatings. He repeatedly knocked me to the ground, threw me against the wall, pulled my long hair and gave me black eyes, fat lips, and bruises. When people asked me ‘What happened to you?’ I said I was clumsy.”

I am looking into the beautiful eyes of this amazing woman, wondering what helped her survive such severe abuse.

“How about your mother?” I am hoping she received some nurturing from her mom.

“My mother also hit me and burned me with cigarettes. She left when I was 12 years old. My father wanted to place me in an orphanage and take my siblings to live with his new wife. Thank God, my paternal grandmother took me.”

“I wonder how you felt as a child being so severely mistreated by both parents.”

“I felt abandoned, unloved, unworthy, and ugly. I couldn’t trust anyone. I learned quickly to become self-reliant. I was betrayed and my heart was aching.”

“How was life with grandmother?”

“She made me work. She dressed me like an old woman. Both my older sisters got pregnant at 16 so she dressed me like an old woman so no boy would be interested in me.”

“I wonder if she intended to protect you from early pregnancy given the experience of your sisters.”

“Yes, I know that was her intention. I excelled in school and graduated from high school at 16 years of age. I got my first job in a typing pool at AT&T two weeks after graduating in downtown Chicago. I had to get up at 5 a.m., take two buses, the subway, and walk about a mile to get to work in the 100 degree heat, thunder storms, snow and cold up to 20 below zero.”

“You must be very bright and intelligent. It is amazing you have done so well in school given your childhood experiences.”

“I am a fast learner.”

“I imagine you must have some interesting stories to tell about working at that young age.”

“Yes, I had quite a few interesting and dangerous experiences. One time, a man was sitting on the subway at 6 a.m. in front of me holding a newspaper pretending he was reading it. The paper started to move. When he removed the paper, his genitals were exposed. I only weighed about 100 pounds. I pointed and laughed at him and thought, ‘Don’t be afraid. I can take him if he attacks me.’ I left the subway at the next station as he glared at me.”

“What a courageous woman you are.”

“Another time, when I was getting off the subway, a huge man pulled a gun to me as the subway door opened.”

“Give me your money!” he said with an intimidating voice.

I was shocked, shaken and holding my lunch bag. I handed him the bag and ran down the stairs of the station. I called the police when I got to work. When they asked if he took my money, I said “No, but he took my lunch.”

We both laughed. I felt as if she was back in time, remembering. I was in awe of this courageous young woman handling a possible life threatening situation. I wondered if she had been guided by a loving entity. She was well aware she could have been shot.

“You have been quite successful in your careers. How did you manage this?”

“I have always been able to make money working for large corporations. I am computer literate, but never took classes.”

“I can see how your high IQ helped you with your career. How about your personal life, given all the childhood wounds?”

“I met my first boyfriend at age of 20 in a bar. He was a rock singer and I fell in love with his voice. We got married and had three children. He got involved with drugs and didn’t want to work or be a father. I stayed with him for 10 years and divorced him.”

“How did you manage as a single parent?”

“I worked three part time jobs. One job was at a printing company where I met a man who became my second husband. He wanted children. I was not in love with him, but he was a great friend. We were together for 18 years. He was pretty conservative, had deep distrust and depressed. I felt ignored.

One night, under the influence of alcohol, I had a one night stand with a man. I told my husband what happened. He wanted to rebuild our relationship. But this didn’t happen. He began to treat me badly. I saw a therapist and came to a realization he was going to punish me consciously or unconsciously. I divorced him in 1999.”

“How about the children?”

“They were grown and on their own by then. This was the first time I was living independently and only responsible for myself. I loved it.

In 2001, my employer relocated me from Chicago to California. I worked from home, felt disconnected and was not adjusting to my new life very well.”

“How did you like living in California?”

“When I had been here for two years, my employer wanted to relocate me back to Chicago. I quit my job because to me, California is paradise. I had never had difficulty finding jobs. There were times I was penniless yet I always landed my feet. I was in my early 60’s couldn’t find a job. Because I was over qualified, I started freelancing. However, with the bad economy, my clients could not pay me; some even went bankrupt. I was in debt and lost my retirement in the market. On August 15, 2005, I had 32 cents in my pocket. And no options.

“Did you really want to die?”

“Just like most people who think about suicide, it is to end the pain not really wanting to die. My two older sisters committed suicide and I know how this devastated their families. Instead, I started yelling at God, saying, ‘If I’m supposed to be here, what am I supposed to do?’”

“That is true when one feels trapped in a situation with no way out, the thought of suicide appears to be an option. Do you remember how you felt in that moment of yelling at God?”

“I felt if I held on, something good was going to happen. Something changed inside me.” “Perhaps a ray of hope.”

“Seventy-two days later, when I was at home, a friend knocked on my door. I didn’t answer. She said, ‘I know you’re in there’ open the door.’ She wouldn’t go away. I opened the door. She handed me a ticket to a women’s conference. She said, ‘I will pick you up in two days at 6:30 am. Be ready!’ And she left. I held the ticket in my hand.

She picked me up as she agreed. I sat in the Women’s Conference hosted by then-First Lady Maria Shriver listening to women presenters, thinking how amazing they were, inspiring the audience. I wanted to be like them, and felt jealous. Then I mused out loud, ‘Someone should write a book about them!’”

”I heard a clear voice from behind saying “Why not you? I turned around thinking, ‘Who – me? Write a book?’ There was no one there.

“No one was sitting behind you?”

“No one was there. I didn’t know whose voice it was at the time, yet it was as clear as your voice speaking to me right now. I ‘pitched’ the first four women about a book I was writing called Women Rising From the Ashes. They asked for an overview before they committed to an interview. I went home, wrote one, and emailed it to them.

“I eventually interviewed 25 women from around the world and promised I would publish their stories.

I was unable to find a publisher, so during the summer of 2014, I decided to self-publish. However, my hard drive crashed and had no back up. There went my book which took eight years of writing.

I decided there was a reason this happened. I believe the universe wanted me to weave my story throughout the book which chronicled my dark night of the soul and eventual spiritual transformation. During December 2014, I published From Ash to Flame: Women Rising.”

“What an inspiring journey.”

“These women helped me heal. Today, I like who I have become. I am in peace and live life with gratitude for all my life experiences – even the traumatic ones which helped me find my courage and strength.”

“Wow! I wonder how you reached the point of self-love and inner peace.”

“I was able to forgive my parents, my husbands and, most importantly, forgive myself for the mistakes I’ve made. There was a moment of truth when I saw a drawing of a little boy saying, ‘God doesn’t make junk.’

“It is wonderful to be grateful for ALL of our life experiences. Once we realize we are being prepared for our divine purpose, it makes sense as if pieces of a life puzzle comes together. I know you are now teaching classes on Healing the Wounded Child Within.”

“Yes, every Monday evening from 7-9 p.m. at the Temple of Light, I am sharing the women’s stories and tools I’ve learned with others. Each week, we focus on one topic doing a group discussion, creative writing and art exercises and a guided meditation.

“I bet you have interesting stories about students who attend.”

“Yes, one time, a woman emailed me, ‘There is NO Hope.’”

“I understood perfectly so I immediately contacted her and asked her to call me. When we connected, I invited her to come to the class. She said she couldn’t afford it because she is unemployed. I wanted her to be invested in her healing, so told her to pay whatever she could. She came. After a few session she shared she had planned to take her life when she wrote of having no hope.”

“You facilitated another butterfly to emerge.”

“She was the one who saved her life, not me.”

“I wonder if your reaching out to her gave her the courage to connect with life again.

I heard you have donated a kidney anonymously. Would you share that story?”

“In August 2009, I was at a conference in which a woman I knew, but hadn’t seen for a while, shared she had just returned to work after giving a kidney to her husband. I heard ‘the voice’ again challenge me with, ‘Why not you?’ I felt even though I was 64 years old, I was blessed with good health and could live with one kidney. My blood type is AB+. I went to Cedar Sinai, but they had no altruistic donor program. I then called UCLA and volunteered to give my kidney to a stranger. I researched UCLA’s donor program and they never lost a donor. I even had to have a psychological evaluation to become a donor. It is interesting people believe when a person donates to a loved one, it is love. When I wanted to donate to another human being, it seemed as if they were looking for an ulterior motive.”

“It took me a lifetime to realize we all come from the same source and are all connected.”

“People like you give me hope to humanity at large. Did you ever learn who received the kidney?”

“Yes, a woman from India who lives in New Mexico now. She is doing very well.” Her smile was radiant and priceless.

“I know you are in charge of the Temple’s magazine Radiance. I read an article by you about your work with children from the Masaii tribe in Amboseli, Kenya.”

“Yes, a friend of mine started a non-profit to send 20 children from 5-16 to private school who previously were either not in school or a government school with no enough books or teachers. She is sponsoring 16 children and I am only sponsoring two. There are two other sponsors as well.. The cost is $34 per month.”

“I loved the photos of the children.”

“These children get a cup of tea for breakfast and lunch. When we were there in June 2015, we brought them to the resort we were staying and it was the first time they had eaten at a beautifully set table, with orange juice, toast, potatoes, eggs, and fruit and then lunch after they went swimming in a pool with clear water they had also never seen before.”

“It makes my heart smile. I wonder the happiness of the children to see a friend coming all the way from America to bring HOPE to them. Some say if we have only one person in the whole world who cares about us, we are in good mental health. The person does not need to be physically close, only knowing someone cares. What about the photos with cheetahs?”

“We also went to South Africa where there is much racial tension after Nelson Mandela passed away. We took care of the Cheetahs for two weeks at a compound called The Cheetah Experience. It was a tough job. I slept with the cheetahs outdoor in sleeping bags one night and didn’t sleep”

“I can’t imagine sleeping between two cheetahs. That must have been a life altering experience for you, overcoming your fears.”

“Yes, I have overcome much fear in my life. I was really frightened of heights. To overcome the fear, I created a fund raiser to help prevent human trafficking and jumped out of a plane to raise money.”

“Wow, you have come a long way in your personal transformation. I wonder if there was a critical experience or moment you had an inner shift.”

She didn’t need to think.

“Yes, on my 18th birthday. My father beat me badly, threw me against the wall and then onto the floor. I was in severe pain. When I saw him coming towards me again, I suddenly felt an inner shift, although I was only 4’11”, I felt 10 feet tall. I stood up and punched him in the face. He looked stunned as I shouted, ‘You will NEVER hit me again.’ And he didn’t. I will never forget that infusion of power. I was empowered!”

I feel as if I am in the presence of a holy person, an angel of empowerment honoring the divine feminine energy. My heart is filled with joy.

“Thank you Basia, the world needs to know about human beings like you, any final message to close?”

“No ending …only a beginning…”

Note for Orange County residents:

Basia’s classes are $20/class. If one buys her book, can have two free classes.

 

 

 

 

Links – Website www.basiachrist.com

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/basiachristspeaker/

Speaker Profile: http://luminaryvoices.com/

You Tube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsBg9WyQLl8MGzLkzBRDL5g

Email: basia@basiachrist.com

 

Translated in German by Ulrike Boker

„Gott, wenn es dich gibt, gib mir einen Grund zu leben. Hilf mir bitte.“

Ich sitze mit dieser schönen, phänomenalen Frau zusammen, um begierig die Geschichte ihrer spirituellen Transformation zu hören. Wie ist dieser schöne, bunte Schmetterling aus einem dunklen Kokon entstanden, fragte ich mich…?

„Was passierte zu dieser Zeit in deinem Leben? Wie lange ist das her?“

Am 15.August 2005, ich war am Ende. Ich fühlte, ich hätte keinen Grund mehr zu leben. Ich hatte kein Geld, hinkte Monate hinter meinen Rechnungen hinterher, war arbeitslos und lebte im Jahre 2001 in Kalifornien, weg von Freunden und der Familie in Chicago.

“Es scheint, dass du entschlossen warst, dir das Leben zu nehmen. Was hat dich inspiriert, dich an Gott zu wenden?”

“Ich hatte allen Glauben an Gott verloren, seit ich 12 Jahre alt war. Mit dem, was ich als Kind erlebt hatte, hörte ich auf, an Gott zu glauben. Ich dachte, wenn es Gott geben würde, hätte er eingegriffen und den Missstand gestoppt.”

“Ja, ich kann das nachempfinden, ich fühlte mich genauso. Für ein junges, unschuldiges, abhängiges Kind sitzt der Schmerz tief, und man hat keine Wahl, die familiären Missstände zu verlassen. Was für eine Familie hattest du?”

“Ich wurde 1946 in Chicago in einer Arbeiter-Familie geboren. Mein Vater war Alkoholiker, der seine Frustration mit Schlägen auf mich auslebte. Immer wieder warf er mich auf den Boden, stieß mich gegen die Wand, zog an meinen langen Haaren und verursachte bei mir blaue Augen, geschwollene Lippen und Prellungen. Wenn mich Leute fragten, was mit mir passiert sei, antwortete ich, ich sei ungeschickt gewesen.

Ich sehe in die schönen Augen dieser erstaunlichen Frau, und fragte mich, was ihr half, solch einen schweren Missbrauch zu überleben.

“Was war mit deiner Mutter?” Ich hoffte, dass sich ihre Mutter um sie gekümmert hatte.

“Meine Mutter hat mich ebenso geschlagen und mich mit Zigaretten verbrannt. Als ich 12 Jahre alt war, verließ sie uns. Mein Vater wollte mich in ein Waisenhaus stecken und meine Geschwister sollten bei seiner neuen Frau leben. Gott sei Dank nahm mich meine Großmutter zu sich.”

“Ich frage mich, wie du dich gefühlt hast, als Kind von beiden Elternteilen so schwer misshandelt worden zu sein.”

“Ich fühlte mich verlassenen, ungeliebt, wertlos und hässlich. Ich konnte mich niemandem anvertrauen. Ich habe schnell gelernt, selbständig zu werden. Ich wurde verraten und mein Herz schmerzte.”

Wie verlief das Leben mit deiner Großmutter?

“Sie schickte mich arbeiten. Sie kleidete mich wie eine alte Frau. Meine beiden älteren Schwestern wurden schon mit 16 Jahren schwanger, so dass sie mich wie eine alte Frau anzog, damit kein Junge an mir interessiert wäre.”

“Ich frage mich, ob sie dich angesichts der Erfahrungen deiner Schwestern vor einer frühen Schwangerschaft schützen wollte.

“Ja, ich weiß, dass das ihre Absicht war. Ich war sehr gut in der Schule und machte mein Abitur bereits im Alter von 16 Jahren. Ich bekam meinen ersten Job in einer Schreibzentrale bei AT&T zwei Wochen nachdem ich in Chicago promoviert hatte. Ich musste um 05:00 Uhr aufstehen, zwei Busse nehmen, dann mit der U-Bahn fahren und 1,5 km zu Fuß gehen, um zu meiner Arbeitsstelle zu gelangen.., und das bei 380 C Hitze , bei Gewitter, Schnee und Kälte bis zu – 280 C .“

“Du musst sehr gescheit und intelligent sein. Es ist erstaunlich, dass du so erfolgreich in der Schule warst, trotz deiner Erfahrungen, die du in der Kindheit gemacht hast.”

“Ich lerne schnell.”

“Ich kann mir vorstellen, dass du einige interessanten Geschichten über die Arbeit in diesem jungen Alter zu erzählen hast.”

“Ja, ich habe einige interessante und gefährliche Erfahrungen gemacht. Einmal saß morgens um 6:00 Uhr ein Mann in der U-Bahn vor mir und hielt eine Zeitung vor sich, als ob er lesen würde. Das Papier begann sich zu bewegen. Als er die Zeitung entfernte, waren seine Genitalien zu sehen. Ich wog nur etwa 45 kg. Ich wies ihn darauf hin und lachte ihn aus und dachte, ‘ hab keine Angst‘. Ich kann ihn bezwingen, wenn er mich angreift. ” Ich verließ die U-Bahn an der nächsten Station und er starrte mir zornig an.”

“ Was für eine couragierte Frau du bist.”

Ein anderes Mal, zielte ein großer Mann eine Pistole auf mich, als ich aus der U-Bahn steigen wollte und sich die Tür öffnete.”

“ Gib mir dein Geld, sagte er mit einschüchternder Stimme.”

Ich war schockiert und aufgewühlt und hielt die Tasche mit meinem Mittagessen in der Hand. Ich gab ihm die Tasche und rannte die Treppe des Bahnhofs herunter. Ich rief die Polizei, als ich bei meiner Arbeitsstelle angekommen war. Als man mich fragte, ob er mir mein Geld gestohlen hätte, sagte ich: “Nein, aber er nahm mir mein Mittagessen.”

Wir lachten beide. Ich spürte, dass sie sich in der Vergangenheit befand und die Erinnerungen hoch kamen. Ich hatte Ehrfurcht vor dieser mutigen jungen Frau, wie sie mit einer möglichen lebensbedrohlichen Lage umgegangen ist. Ich fragte mich, ob sie ein liebevolles Wesen geleitet hatte. Sie war sich sehr wohl bewusst, dass sie hätte erschossen werden können.

“Du warst in deiner Karriere sehr erfolgreich. Wie hast du das geschafft?”

“Ich konnte immer bei großen Konzernen Geld verdienen. Ich habe ein gutes Computerwissen, obwohl ich nie Kurse besucht habe.”

“Ich sehe, wie dein hoher IQ dir bei deiner Karriere geholfen hat. Wie ist es mit deinem persönliches Leben, das durch alle Wunden der Kindheit geprägt ist?”

“Meinen ersten Freund traf ich im Alter von 20 Jahren in einer Bar. Er war ein Rock-Sänger und ich verliebte mich in seine Stimme. Wir haben geheiratet und hatten drei Kinder. Er geriet in Kontakt mit Drogen und wollte nicht mehr arbeiten oder ein Vater sein. Ich blieb 10 Jahre lang bei ihm und ließ mich dann scheiden.”

“Wie hast du das als alleinerziehende Mutter geschafft?”

“Ich hatte drei Teilzeit-Arbeitsplätze. Mein erster Job war in einer Druckerei, wo ich einen Mann traf, der mein zweiter Ehemann wurde. Er wollte Kinder. Ich war nicht in ihn verliebt, aber er war ein guter Freund. Wir waren 18 Jahre lang zusammen. Er war ziemlich konservativ, hatte ein tiefes Misstrauen und war deprimiert. Ich hatte das Gefühl, er würde mich ignorieren.

Eines Nachts, hatte ich unter Einfluss von Alkohol einen ONE NIGHT STAND mit einem Mann. Ich sagte meinem Mann, was passiert war. Er wollte unsere Beziehung wieder neu aufbauen, aber dies ist nicht geschehen. Er begann, mich schlecht zu behandeln. Ich suchte einen Therapeuten auf und kam zu der Erkenntnis, dass er mich bewusst oder unbewusst bestrafen wollte. Wir wurden 1999 geschieden.”

“Was geschah mit den Kindern?”

“Sie waren inzwischen erwachsen und standen auf eigenen Beinen. Dies war das erste Mal, dass ich unabhängig war und nur für mich selbst verantwortlich lebte. Ich liebte es.

Im Jahr 2001 versetzte mich mein Arbeitgeber von Chicago nach Kalifornien. Ich arbeitete von zu Hause aus, fühlte mich ausgeschlossen und konnte mich anfangs nicht sehr gut meinem neuen Leben anpassen.”

“ Wie hat es dir gefallen, in Kalifornien zu leben? “

“Als ich zwei Jahren lang hier war, wollte mich mein Arbeitgeber zurück nach Chicago holen. Ich kündigte meinen Job, weil ich das nicht wollte, denn für mich war Kalifornien inzwischen zum Paradies geworden. Ich hatte nie Schwierigkeiten, Arbeit zu finden. Es gab Zeiten, in denen ich mittellos war, dennoch landete ich immer wieder auf meinen Füßen. Ich war Anfang 60 und konnte keinen Job zu finden. Da ich überqualifiziert war, begann ich, freiberuflich tätig zu werden. Jedoch konnten mich bei der schlechten Wirtschaftslage meine Kunden nicht bezahlen; Einige gingen sogar in Konkurs. Ich hatte Schulden und verlor meine Pensionsansprüche. Am 15. August 2005 hatte ich 32 Cent in meiner Tasche und keine weiteren Optionen.

“Wolltest du wirklich sterben?”

“Genau wie bei den meisten Menschen, die an Selbstmord denken, geht es in erster Linie darum, DEN SCHMERZ BEENDEN zu beenden und nicht wirklich darum, sterben zu wollen. Meine beiden älteren Schwestern hatten Selbstmord begangen, und ich weiß, wie das ihre Familien verwüstete. Stattdessen begann ich, zu Gott, zu sprechen: “Wenn ich dazu bestimmt bin, hier zu sein, was soll ich tun?”

“Das ist wahr, wenn sich jemand in einer Situation gefangen fühlt, aus der man keinen Ausweg findet, scheint der Gedanke an Selbstmord eine Option zu sein. Erinnerst du dich, wie du dich diesem Moment, als du Gott gerufen hast, gefühlt hast?“

“Ich spürte, wenn ich daran festhalten würde, könnte etwas Gutes geschehen. Etwas in mir veränderte sich.” “Vielleicht ein Strahl der Hoffnung.”

“Zweiundsiebzig Tage später, als ich zu Hause war, klopfte eine Freundin an meine Tür. Ich habe nicht reagiert. Sie sagte: ‘Ich weiß, dass du da bist‘, öffne die Tür.” Ich wusste, sie würde nicht weggehen. Ich öffnete die Tür. Sie gab mir ein Ticket für eine Frauenkonferenz. Sie sagte: “Ich hole dich in zwei Tagen morgens um 06:30Uhr ab. Sei bereit! ” Und sie ging wieder. Ich hielt das Ticket in meiner Hand.

Sie holte mich wie sie vereinbart ab. Ich saß in der Frauenkonferenz, die von der damaligen First Lady in Kalifornien, Maria Shriver, veranstaltet wurde und hörte Moderatorinnen zu , die meinten, wie fantastisch sie wären und sie begeisterten das Publikum. Ich wollte sein wie sie und war neidisch. Dann habe ich wohl laut gedacht, “Jemand sollte ein Buch über sie schreiben! ”

” “Ich hörte eine klare Stimme von hinten sagen: “Warum nicht Sie? Ich drehte mich um und dachte: Wer? – Ich? – Ein Buch schreiben? ” ES WAR NIEMAND DA.

“ Es hatte niemand hinter dir gesessen?”

“Niemand war dort. Ich wusste zu der Zeit nicht, wessen Stimme es damals war, doch sie war so klar wie deine Stimme, die zu mir spricht. Ich nahm die ersten vier Frauen, die ich bezüglich meines Buches, das ich gerade schrieb, interviewen wollte. Es hieß: Women Rising From the Ashes Sie wollten zuerst einen Überblick darüber bekommen, bevor sie einem Interview zustimmten, Ich ging nach Hause, schrieb die entsprechenden Erklärungen auf und sendete sie ihnen per e-Mail.

“Letztendlich interviewte ich 25 Frauen aus aller Welt und versprach , dass ich ihre Geschichten veröffentlichen würde.

Ich war nicht in der Lage, einen Verleger zu finden, also beschloss ich im Sommer 2014, das Buch eigenständig zu veröffentlichen. Jedoch stürzte meine Festplatte ab und ich hatte keine Sicherungskopie gemacht. Da ging mein Buch dahin, das acht Jahre gedauert hatte, bis es geschrieben war.

Ich entschied für mich, dass es einen Grund gab, warum dies geschah.. Ich glaube, dass das Universum wollte, dass ich meine Lebensgeschichte durch das Buch, das die schwarze Nacht meiner Seele und vielleicht die spirituelle Transformation dokumentiert, einflechte. Im Dezember 2014, veröffentlichte ich From Ash to Flame: Women Rising.”

“Was für eine inspirierende Reise.“

“Diese Frauen halfen mir dabei, mich selbst zu heilen. Ich mag es, wer ich geworden bin. Ich bin in Frieden mit mir selbst und lebe das Leben mit Dankbarkeit für alle Lebenserfahrungen –selbst die traumatischen, die mir geholfen haben meinen Mut und meine Stärke zu finden.”

“Wow! Ich bin gespannt, wie du den Punkt der Selbstliebe und des inneren Friede erreicht hast.”

“Ich konnte meinen Eltern und meinen Ehemännern verzeihen, und vor allem konnte ich mir selbst verzeihen für die Fehler die ich gemacht habe. Da war eine Moment der Wahrheit, als ich eine Zeichnung von einen kleinen Jungen sah, die sagte: “Gott macht nicht Unnützes”

“Es ist wunderbar für alle unsere Lebenserfahrungen dankbar zu sein. Sobald wir realisieren, dass wir für unseren göttlichen Zweck vorbereitet werden, ist es sinnvoll , dass sie als Teile eines Lebens-Puzzle zusammen kommen. Ich weiß, dass du heute in Kursen lehrst, die inneren Wunden eines Kind zu heilen.”

“Ja, jeden Montagabend von 17-19 Uhr im Tempel des Lichts. Ich gebe die Geschichten der Frauen und die Hilfen, die ich mit anderen gelernt habe weiter. Jede Woche konzentrieren wir uns auf ein Thema, führen eine Gruppendiskussion, bieten kreative Schreiben und Kunst-Übungen und eine geführte Meditation an.

“Ich wette du erfährst interessante Geschichten über die Studenten, die teilnehmen.”

“Ja, einmal schickte mir eine Frau eine per e-Mail mit den Worten ; “Es gibt keine Hoffnung.””

“Ich konnte sie gut verstehen, so dass ich sie sofort kontaktierte und sie bat, mich anzurufen. Als wir telefonierten, lud ich sie ein, zu dem Kurs zu kommen. Sie sagte, dass sie es sich nicht leisten könnte, weil sie arbeitslos sei. Ich wollte, dass sie bei ihrer Heilung unterstützt würde, also bot ich ihr an, so viel zu bezahlen, wie sie konnte. Sie kam. Nach einigen Sitzungen erzählte sie, dass sie geplant hatte, sich das Leben zu nehmen, als sie schrieb, dass sie keine Hoffnung mehr hätte.”

“Du hast einem weiteren Schmetterling erleichtert, sich zu entwickeln.”

“Sie war diejenige, die ihr Leben rettete, nicht ich.”

“Ich frage mich, ob ihr Kontakt zu der Frau ihr den Mut gab, sich wieder mit dem Leben zu verbinden.

Ich hörte, dass Sie anonym eine Niere gespendet haben. Würden Sie diese Geschichte teilen?”

“Im August 2009 war ich auf einer Konferenz, auf der eine Frau, die ich zwar kannte, aber länger nicht gesehen hatte, erzählte, sie wäre gerade erst wieder angefangen zu arbeiten, nachdem sie ihrem Ehemann eine Niere gespendet hatte. Ich hörte wieder diese ‘Stimme’, die mich wieder herausforderte: ‘Warum nicht?’ Ich fühlte mich, obwohl ich 64 Jahre war alt war, mit einer guten Gesundheit gesegnet und könnte mit einer Niere leben. Meine Blutgruppe ist AB +. Ich ging zu Cedar Sinai, aber sie hatten kein uneigennütziges Spender-Programm. Dann rief ich bei UCLA an und meldete mich freiwillig, eine meiner Nieren zu spenden. Ich recherchierte das UCLAS Spender-Programm, und sie hatten nie einen Spender verloren. Ich brauchte sogar ein psychologisches Gutachten, um als Spender in Frage zu kommen. Es ist interessant, dass Menschen glauben, dass, wenn jemand ein Organ für einen nahestehenden Menschen spendet, er es aus Liebe tut. Als ich meins an ein anderes menschliches Wesen spenden wollte, schien es, als ob sie auf der Suche nach einem Hintergedanken waren.”

“Es brauchte ein ganzes Leben, um zu erkennen, dass wir alle aus der gleichen Quelle stammen und alle miteinander verbunden sind.“

“Leute wie du geben mir Hoffnung an die Menschheit im Allgemeinen. Hast du jemals erfahren, wer die Niere erhalten hat?”

“Ja , eine Frau aus Indien, die heute in New Mexico lebt. Es geht ihr sehr gut.” Ihr Lächeln war strahlend und unbezahlbar.“

“Ich weiß, dass du für das Tempel Magazin Radiance verantwortlich bist. Ich las einen Artikel von dir über deine Arbeit mit Kindern aus dem Stamm der Masaii in Amboseli, Kenia.”

“Ja, ein Freundin von mir gründete eine Non-Profit-Organisation um 20 Kinder im Alter von von 5-16 Jahren in eine Privatschule zu schicken, die zuvor nicht in der Schule waren oder eine staatliche Schule besuchten, in der es nicht genug Bücher gab und es an Lehrern mangelte. Sie sponsert 16 Kinder, und ich nur zwei. Es gibt zwei weitere Sponsoren… Die Kosten belaufen sich auf $34 pro Monat.”

“ Ich liebte die Fotos von den Kindern.“

“Diese Kinder bekommen eine Tasse Tee zum Frühstück und ein Mittagessen. Als wir im Juni 2015 dort waren, nahmen wir sie mit zum Resort, in dem wir wohnten, und es war das erste Mal , dass sie an einem schön gedeckten Tisch aßen, mit Orangensaft, Toast, Kartoffeln, Eier und Obst und dann später das Mittagessen, nachdem sie in einem Pool mit klarem Wasser, das sie auch nie zuvor gesehen hatten, schwimmen gegangen waren.”

“”Es brachte mein Herz zum Lachen. Ich war verwundert über die Zufriedenheit der Kinder einen Freund kommen zu sehen, der den ganzen Weg aus Amerika auf sich genommen hat, um ihnen Hoffnung zu bringen. Einige von ihnen sagen, wenn wir nur eine Person auf der ganzen Welt haben, dem wir am Herzen liegen, sind wir bei guter mentaler Gesundheit. Es ist nicht notwendig, dass man dieser Person sehr nahe steht, solange man weiß, dass sich jemand kümmert. Was ist mit den Fotos von den Geparden?

“Wir gingen auch nach Südafrika wo es viele rassistische Spannung nach Nelson Mandela Tod gab. Wir sorgten 2 Wochen lang für die Geparden auf einem eingezäunten Platz namens „The Cheetah-Experience.“ Es war ein hartes Stück Arbeit. Ich schlief eine Nacht lang im Schlafsack mit den Geparden im Freien und konnte nicht schlafen.“

“Ich kann mir nicht vorstellen, zwischen zwei Geparden zu schlafen. Das muss eine lebensverändernde Erfahrung für dich gewesen sein, deine Ängste zu überwinden. „

“Ja, ich habe viel Angst in meinem Leben überwinden müssen. Ich hatte wirklich Höhenangst. Um die Angst zu überwinden, gründete ich mal einen Fund-Raiser um den Menschenhandel zu verhindern und sprang mit dem Fallschirm aus einem Flugzeug, um Geld zu sammeln.”

“Wow, du bist in deiner persönlichen Transformation weit kommen. Ich frage mich, ob es eine kritische Erfahrung oder einen Moment gab, was zu einer inneren Umkehr führte.”

Sie brauchte nicht nachzudenken.

“Ja, an meinem 18. Geburtstag. Mein Vater schlug mich fest, warf mich gegen die Wand und dann auf den Boden. Ich verspürte starke Schmerzen. Als ich ihn wieder auf mich zukommen sah, fühlte ich plötzlich eine innere Veränderung: obwohl ich nur 1,50 m groß war, fühlte ich mich 3 Meter groß. Ich stand auf und schlug ihm ins Gesicht. Er schaute mich fassungslos an, als ich rief: “ Du wirst mich niemals mehr schlagen.” Und er tat es nicht. Ich werde nie diese Infusion der Stärke vergessen. Ich hatte Macht!”

Ich fühle mich, als ob ich mich in der Gegenwart einer heiligen Person befände, einem Engel der Ermächtigung, zu Ehren der göttlichen weiblichen Energie. Mein Herz ist voller Freude.

Danke Basia, die Welt muss von Menschen wie dich erfahren! Hast du noch eine abschließende Nachricht?

“Kein Ende.. ……nur ein Anfang…”

 

Anmerkung für Orange County Residenten:

Die Kosten für Basias Kurse betragen $20 je Kurs.

Beim Kauf von  ihrem  Buch  sind 2 Kurse kostenfrei.